"Gravity" by Sara Bareilles

When I first heard this song, I didn't find it particularly captivating. I knew I should and that in the future I would. Anya loved it. She told me she listened to it nonstop. I found myself wondering why it hadn't made me stop in my tracks the first time. However, recently, when perusing YouTube and Dilandau.com, I had a sudden impulse to download it. It's been in my head ever since.

They say that true love only happens once. But to me, it's happened twice - at least in the way that it happens to anyone. What is love anyway? A disproportional care for someone such that you're willing to give up your own short-term happiness in hopes to achieve a long-term one with him? A intense variation of attraction that gives you shivers by the mere memory of a smile? Perhaps these things are involved, but what love really is is gravity. It's that inevitable pull that ties you to the person in question, bringing you back to them even when your feet, mind and even spirit have carried you far away. I've had this feeling twice, obviously - about Edward first, then Jacob. My conscience, in relation to my own well-being was telling me to move on. My instinct professed the opposite. And denying it only led to more pain.

I see Jacob in the hallway. Even with those ridiculous shorts that he wears in the middle of November, he is beautiful. His hair with its perfect curls shapes the lovely contours of his head. His eyes may be brown, but with the way they shine, they might as well be green. His skin, milky and smooth emits a light that hits me from yards away. The sound of his presence in the room is too loud to ignore, no matter how many mental ear plugs I expend in vain.

Feeling this way, it is impossible for me to pretend otherwise. I have tried. I have tried more times perhaps than I have with Edward and I have failed every time. So I'm going to try something new. I am going to surrender to his gravity in the time we have left. I am going to give him my full soul. Like I did with my application to my top choice college, I will hold nothing back. This is meant to happen and I know it. Therefore I must chill and let the pain pass as it will. Love is gravity. And I am in love.

Lyrics to "Gravity":

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign.

[CHORUS:]
Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

[CHORUS]

I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you're everything I think I need here on
The ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down

Link to Music Video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3mKQT08_rk